narcissist

Many questions can be answered with either a yes or no. When you ask a person a question, the longer they talk the more they avoid the answer.  When you are listening to continual verbiage, you know not only they will not answer what you asked but they will circumvent whatever you asked.  Even if it is through a text, they can speak paragraphs without really saying anything.  The narcissist is really good at not answering and coming up with a variety of lies.  Their only problem is that they cannot always keep their lies straight. It is really true in life about almost anything.  For example, an employee decides to ask for a raise. They are entitled to one as they have worked quite hard and their performance reports state that they are doing an excellent job, always on time and stay late to finish projects.  The boss can easily say yes or not to his question.  Instead, he receives the basic run a round and his question is never answered.  He then walks away wondering what had just happened.  I have seen this in movies, court, the workplace, and even with family members.  You repeatedly ask the same question but never even receive a yes or no answer.  If we start now teaching our children to be truthful the world would be a better place.  In the Good Gus series, particularly in book four, “Johnny the Cat and Bronco Ride that Bull,” the boys skip off to see the rodeo and don’t even answer either their mother or father.  The point of that story was they were disobeying their parents and there were consequences.  The series is available online at Kindle with a few books on Nook and Waterstones. Getting a yes or no answer by the characters in “Misplaced Trust” is close to impossible.  The book is online at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Scribd, Playster and Tolino.

My daughter posted a sign  on Facebook that said: “Accusations from a narcissist are actually confessions.”  There were comments of people agreeing with this statement one hundred percent.  All narcissists use the same vocabulary and say the same words.  The fact that the sign said that their accusations were confessions is amazing.  If you have ever dealt with a narcissist you would understand. In the media, accusations are an everyday occurance.  They throw them out there and then wait to see what happens.  Sometimes they are denied,  proven to be just false or a new form of accusatory lies appear and the dust settles on the original victim.  This is a staple in politics.  As the politicians compete with one another, they start with all types of accusations.  Often when they are proven false they simply move on to new ones.  If a person doesn’t have proof, they should not say things that are untrue just to hurt another person.  That is really all it amounts to.  The majority of the time it is nothing more than lies.  It even happens in elementary all the way up to high school.  Once the words are spoken, the gossip spreads and before long a student is hurt.  It doesn’t achieve anything.  For the person dealing with a narcissist, it gives them an opportunity to confront them and solve your issues.  In the Good Gus series Bad Bart was accusatory towards Bob.  However, Sheriff Gus solved the problem and proved that Bad Bart was wrong and that there was a different approach that could solve the problem.  You can easily access the books online at Kindle with a few books on Nook and Waterstones.  “Misplaced Trust” is full of characters who think nothing of making accusations.  The book would be great for holiday reading.  It’s online at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Scribd, Playster and Tolino.

 

  Have you ever met anyone who was an egomaniac? They are also known as a narcissist.  There are continual articles about women fighting in a divorce with an egomaniac. They are very good at acting and appearing like the perfect person or parent.  The reality is they want everything their way and they want it NOW.  They can make the women look really bad with lies, innuendo’s and general falsehoods.  They use more effort, time and money to destroy their ex.  They have extreme vengeance and have no empathy for their children.  They appear so innocent and act as if they have never done a wrong thing in their lives.  Their faces can portray humility when in reality they have none.  I have read about countless cases in a variety of states.  The women are always portrayed as bad.  The children really want their mothers but the female judges decline.  It takes years for the mothers to get their children back.  They fight, lose money and in the end the children need therapy.  Dealing with an egomaniac in the workplace is a nightmare. They are always right and tend to lose their tempers if anyone disagrees with them.  If they make a mistake it doesn’t matter, however if an employee does they are fired but only after being degraded and humiliated.  The egomaniac has a personality disorder that really needs therapy.  In the Good Gus series the only character who was an egomaniac was Bad Bart.  He turned around, though, which is the point of the story.  It’s also a good lesson for the children.  The series is online at Kindle with a few books on Nook and Waterstones. “Misplaced Trust” is full of egomaniacs.  It can be found online at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Playster,  Scribd and Tolino.

People are preoccupied with many minor issues but often miss the big picture. People are fighting about masks which is minor comparing to catching COVID, the flu or something else. With the lack of socialization, teenagers, and even young children are so preoccupied with not having a social life that they are ending their lives.  The State of Nevada is so worried about this that they are considering opening the schools.  Narcissists are also preoccupied.  They are so envious of others that they have fantasies of  unlimited power, extreme success,  believe they brilliant and all men or women want them.  Sadly, many are failures in life, never succeeding financially and are usually alone as their hopes for love dissipate when the person they think should love them see their true self and call it quits.  Being preoccupied with the small and insignificant leads to missing out on important events, frequent loss of money, a lack of success and a poor work ethic. If you work for a narcissist you need to be careful in your everyday work environment.  As they usually take credit for your work, you need to watch what you say and do.  If you end up being preoccupied with his or her behavior, you will be the one without a raise or promotion and you may end up losing your job. In the Good Gus series, no one was preoccupied except Bad Bart when he wanted chocolate ice cream.  The series is online at Kindle with a few books on Nook and Waterstones.  In “Misplaced Trust” many of the characters are preoccupied with stealing the other beneficiaries’ inheritance and revenge.  It’s a good read particularly since next week in the northern part of the states snow be be heavy and there will be rain across Europe. The book is online at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Playster,  Scribd and Tolino.

  It is amazing how many people are in the narcissism category.  It is now labeled as a personality disorder.  If you have ever met one you might not know that they even has this disorder.  For example, there is a person in my homeowners association who is the definition of narcissism. He believes he is the owner of everyone’s home and he allows us to live here.  Seriously, that doesn’t  even begin to describe him.  He has an arrogance and a belief he is always one hundred percent right about everything. He has made a mess of the finances for the association which we are slowly digging out it.  Then there is a second man I know that originally appeared to be very nice.  However, once I came to know him, I discovered the true meaning of narcissism.  He is extremely self absorbed, has no empathy whatsoever, everything is always about him regardless of the topic, he believes he is entitled and he works it, and he believes if he states anything it’s the truth, and it NEVER is. He continually brags and when he feels remotely slighted he is the instant victim.  Until this person, I never saw anyone take any situation and turn it into him being a victim. It’s amazing.  About the only character who could be accused of narcissism in the Good Gus series is Bad Bart.  Although, Sheriff Gus straightens him right out.  I was asked today about my books.  I wrote my first book in 2008 in Swords, Ireland, County Dublin.  I was asked to describe the characters.  Without realizing it back then, I wrote about people I had known or know now.  What is interesting is that the books reflect stories that are multicultural.  In “The Special Gift” it never occured to me until someone mentioned it that I written about a multiethnic adoption.  That may be the way we should all think.  Not about nationalities, religious beliefs, political ideas, etc. but who the people really are inside.  The series is online at Kindle with a few books on Nook and Waterstones.  Narcissism runs rampant in “Misplaced Trust.” It’s an easy read online at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Scribd, Playster and Tolino.

Cowards come in many forms.  Most people think of people who have deserted the military.  Yet, there are cowards in our everyday lives.  For example, the men who get women pregnant and then abandon them.  They don’t want the responsibility so they move on rather than accept the consequences of their actions.  They will continue to be cowards as they will repeat their mistakes knowing they can easily run away.  It is easier than facing reality but they do have to live with their cowardice for their entire lives.  Take the celebrities who know they have adult children with mental issues and yet they live on the streets.  They don’t comment and hide to protect their reputations, money, and status in the celebrity circle.  However, once fans discover the truths, they don’t want anything to do with them.  Then, there are the parents who abandon their children.  It can be a father or a mother.  Eventually they return but it’s usually after the child or children are grown or if their spouse is wildly financially successful.  It also seems that people who are cowards are also users of others, one way narcissists.  If you take the time to look, they are easy to spot.  They always want the easy way out and are always a fraud.  There were no characters in the Good Gus series who were cowards.  If anything, they are brave, kind, caring and helpful people.  You can locate the series on Kindle with a few books on Nook and Waterstones.  “Misplaced Trust” for your reading pleasure as a self help book for estate planning can be found at these fine websites: 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Scribd, Playster and Tolino.

 Have you noticed how easy it is to discredit someone?  It occurs everywhere.  It’s in the gossip papers, online, in court, and by word of mouth.  What I don’t understand is why people want to do it?  Once a person says something negative to another person, that person repeats it and before you know it the original discredit spreads like a wildfire.  I know people do it to make themselves feel better.  How long can that last?  There are people who enjoy saying negative things about others.  It’s their way of seeking revenge.  I know a man that has no friends.  He is lonely and would love a girlfriend.  However, he loves gossip, and even if it’s not true he spreads it anyways.  People quickly realize he is lying and no longer associate with him.  Wherever he goes, or wherever he lives, he has no one.  People are who they are.  Oh, they can pretend for a while but eventually the world sees who they really are.  If you are involved with a person, be it at work, a colleague, an acquaintance, or even in a legal matter remember this.  The person who says that a person did something yet the other not only claims innocence, but is charming and so personable that you have to believe them, then you should realize that is just a front.  Underneath is a person who is a liar, possibly a narcissist, and has the goal of destroying you while seeking revenge.  This can easily be documented.  In the Good Gus series, no one was allowed to discredit anyone.  The children face this in school, they don’t need to read it in books.  The series is online at Kindle, Nook and Waterstones.  “Misplaced Trust” has characters easily seeking to discredit others.  The book is a gread read under a shade tree in this heat.  You can find it at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Scribd, Playster and Tolino. I appreciate the continued interest in my crowdfunding.  The site is:  https://www.gofundme.com/f/multicultural-gift-of-reading

There are various tell tale signs that signify your personality traits.  I haven’t always fully understood all the terms of various personality traits.  However, scientific studies and reading has given me a clearer understanding.  If a person is charismatic and in need of continual attention, the chances are they are a narcissist. They may also thrive on being the center of attention.  There are individuals who grew up as an only child and therefore expect to always be the center of attention.  It doesn’t necessarily mean they are a narcissist.  It may be that they have a bent towards acting and crave the attention simply because they were an only child.  Many people fail to listen and have no concept of boundaries.  They also believe that they above everyone else including the law.  Some have a criminal personality trait while others who believe that they are above the law and can do whatever they want.  That is definitely a narcissist personality trait.  They also think nothing of shaming and humiliating others to boost their inadequacies and inferiority complex.  They are never the wrong doers and always blame others.  There are people who hold grudges but not as deeply or as strongly as a narcissist.  They can’t let go.  Seeking revenge is their only option.   It may be why you see so many families torn apart because of revenge.  You can have revenge but your personality craves it and seeks it to satisfy that need.  If you ever notice people who are friendless, it’s for a reason.  They are dull, boring, talk only about themselves, are narcissists, or have undesirable personality traits.  When you think about people having fits of rage, your mind first turns to a person who cannot control themselves or early signs of dementia.  It’s also a strong trait of a narcissist.  These people also don’t work well with others.  There are individuals who were born with a silver spoon and therefore, they believe they are entitled.  If they ever lose their money, they will have no idea how to exist in this world.  In the Good Gus series the many positive personality traits were exhibited by the characters.  It’s ideal reading for the young reader.  It is available online at Kindle, Nook and Waterstones with hard copies at the UPS Store in Tierrasanta, California.  “Misplaced Trust” has all types of characters with a variety of personality traits.  It is online at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Scribd, Playster and Tolino.

People behave one way in the public eye and a different way behind closed doors. To the outside world they look perfect.  There is actually a Hallmark movie entitled, “Perfect on Paper.”  Many people do look that way but underneath there is an entirely different person.  When they are in the public eye they appear to be kind, considerate, thoughtful, and always doing the right thing.  Unfortunately, these are the same people who beat their wives and children, cheat on their partners, falsify their taxes, or are serial killers.  They also fake illness or injury to go on disability in western countries.  They don’t work and claim everything is too difficult.  However, when they believe no one is watching they lift weights, work at side jobs for cash, and in general do whatever a non-disability person would do in their daily lives. They are so good at acting that they are convincing to the public eye.  Unfortunately, when they are exposed they become vicious, violent and revengeful.  If you have ever met anyone like that you can clearly see that they are what the real definition of a narcissist is.  It goes beyond being selfish.  Often by the time a man and particularly a woman figure it all out it is too late.  They are already married, possibly with children, and have a difficult life ahead of them.  It are really falls into the phony category.  Every character in the Good Gus series is exactly as I wrote them.  They are real in the sense that they appear as they were meant to be with good and bad traits.  Available on Kindle and the UPS store in Tierrasanta, California, it is an ideal choice for the young readers for Easter.  A few of the characters in “Misplaced Trust” clearly behaved appropriately in the public eye but when it came down to the money, they were completely the opposite.  It is available at 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Playster,  Scribd and Tolino.

Everyone spends so much time trying to be what they think others want them to be, that they have no idea about their true self.  For example, a narcissist, due to a lack of being over protected or under protected in childhood, doesn’t develop their true self.  In so doing, they are unable to develop a confident self.  As the parent has a disregard for the child’s well being, they lack the development of self-esteem and and the ability to function effectively in society.  In turn they develop a false self.  They build up defenses and have their phony self appear in public.  They can never let anyone know about their true self.  They are the type of person that always has to be in control, continually flattered and reassured about almost everything. They often have a difficult time functions in society.   Many personal relationships start out with a couple never realizing that their partner has no true self and is a narcissist.  In the beginning everything will go smoothly as long as the victim does everything that the narcissist wants and caters to their false self.  However, for many couples, if one of the partners rebels, it can lead to domestic violence or worse.  There are countless books about finding your true self.  You can even watch videos on YouTube to see how to gain inner peace, be in tune with the universe, and seek out ways to bring your inner self to the surface.  All in all, we all want to be happy, find our true self and live in peace.  It’s not always easy in this fast paced, digital, and often violent world.  In the Good Gus series, available on Kindle, the characters were written so the child could see the true self and positive qualities of each person in the stories.  It will remind you of your days of playing cowboys and cowgirls!  In “Misplaced Trust” most of the characters reveal their true self and its all about the money.  It is available on 24 Symbols, Apple, Nook, Kindle, Kobo, Page Foundry, Playster,  Scribd and Tolino.

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